Chapter Seven: The Scoundrel Brother-in-law

And so, that night Chu Dong stayed at the Tan family’s home, even sleeping in Tan Xue’s room. This arrangement left Tan Xue quite displeased. She called Chu Dong aside, secretly and meticulously examined his personal hygiene, and, finding nothing to criticize, stormed off angrily to her younger sister’s room, where she remained.

If there was anyone whom Chu Dong could endure such “humiliation” from, it was only Tan Xue.

Tan Xue’s room was nothing like the vibrant, colorful spaces typical of most young girls. Instead, it was dominated by cool tones, fitting her current status as a young professional, and a future strong woman. Yet Chu Dong knew that beneath it all, this girl loved beauty. As a child, she wouldn’t wear anything but her beloved pink dresses—she supposedly had dozens of them. Even in winter, she wore little pink woolen skirts, all in the name of looking even cuter.

Before Chu Dong entered the room, the sheets had been changed for brand new ones. This wasn’t out of special regard for him, but simply because Tan Xue didn’t want him using her things. Understanding her little schemes, Chu Dong didn’t take offense; after a shower and a bit of wine, he obediently went to bed early.

But around eleven o’clock, he was awakened by the pressing need to use the bathroom. He got up, put on his jacket, and headed for the restroom in the dark. Not finding the light switch, he fumbled his way in, relying on the faint starlight from outside to make out the general location of the toilet.

Just as he was about to relieve himself, the quiet was shattered by a sudden click—the lights flashed on, blinding him—and a figure clad in nothing but a scanty three-piece swimsuit dashed in. As his eyes adjusted, he saw who it was: little Yu’er.

But Chu Dong was already committed, and a powerful stream erupted. Nerves got the better of him, making it come in fits and starts, as if he were firing short bursts. Mortified, he couldn’t stop, yet he couldn’t just halt and risk being remembered as the guy who wet his pants. Both he and Yu’er, never having experienced anything like this, were frozen in shock.

Only when Chu Dong finished, put himself together, and stood at attention did Yu’er snap out of it and slam the bathroom door shut with a bang.

“Yu’er, what happened?” Tan Xue, hearing the noise, sensed something amiss and hurried out. She wore a sky-blue gauze dress under a creamy little jacket, her skin as fair as jade, her hair cascading over her shoulders. Seeing her younger sister’s flustered, lost expression, she pulled her close.

“It was your… your family’s pervert in the bathroom.” Yu’er pointed a tiny finger at the still-lit restroom and crossed her arms.

Tan Xue instantly knew whom her sister meant. Though she’d always begrudged Chu Dong for stealing her first kiss as a child, she didn’t believe he was truly so shameless now. She sat her sister down, draped a jacket over her, gestured toward their parents’ room upstairs, and signaled her to keep quiet.

Then, standing outside the restroom, she lowered her voice and snapped at Chu Dong inside, “What are you doing in there? Get out, now!”

Chu Dong emerged, somewhat embarrassed. Had it been Tan Xue just now, he’d have brushed it off, thick-skinned as he was—after all, she was his nominal girlfriend. But Yu’er was different. No matter what people said about sisters-in-law being halfway to family, this was still mortifying. Even his thick skin couldn’t keep the blush from his face.

“I—I was just using the bathroom, she, I…” Chu Dong stammered, glancing at Yu’er on the sofa, her sister’s jacket draped over her but failing to hide her fair legs. He fumbled for words.

“What do you mean, you? Go back to your room!” Tan Xue, quick-witted as ever, immediately guessed what had happened. She shoved Chu Dong back to her room, and just as she was about to comfort Yu’er, the girl bolted for the bathroom.

“Sis, are you really going to marry that pervert?” Yu’er asked, flopping onto the bed beside her sister.

“He wishes,” Tan Xue replied, lowering her book and dimming the lamp. “That’s just Dad’s wishful thinking. I’d never entrust my happiness to that scoundrel.”

“Still a pervert,” Yu’er added, shaking her little fist in the air.

“Yes, still a pervert,” Tan Xue laughed, hugging her sister.

“You’re laughing?” Yu’er pouted, unhappy with her sister’s schadenfreude.

“No, off to bed now, we have school tomorrow.”

The sisters soon drifted off to sleep, but Chu Dong lay wide awake, staring at the ceiling as if something was propping his eyelids open. What a day it had been: first roped into dinner he couldn’t refuse, then unable to leave after, and finally that embarrassing bathroom incident.

“Is heaven playing a joke on me?” He pulled out a cigarette but, remembering Tan Xue’s warning, put it back in frustration.

Clearly, Tan Xue had no interest in him at all; it was only the two elders of both families who were enthusiastically pushing this match. Chu Dong was enjoying his carefree bachelor life, and if a cold beauty like Tan Xue became his wife, he really wondered if things would turn into a mess. But there was no point worrying about it—better to go play chess with dreams. He yanked the blanket over his head and, before long, fell asleep.

The next morning, the Tan elders were busy preparing breakfast. This wasn’t old Beijing—here, no matter the family’s wealth or status, soy milk and fried dough sticks were irreplaceable. Today, the Tan family breakfast table was more lavish than usual. Yu’er, still smarting from the previous night, made no effort to be ladylike. She snatched all her favorites to her and her sister’s side of the table, shooting Chu Dong a defiant look that said, “Let’s see if you can leave us nothing this time.”

Chu Dong never had much appetite in the morning, no matter how sumptuous the fare, so he ate only a little. Yu’er, despite her efforts to claim a bounty, could not eat much and soon left for school. That left Tan Xue, eating elegantly and refusing to spare Chu Dong a glance.

When Chu Dong was about to take his leave, Mr. Tan dropped a bombshell.

“Dongzi, you and Xue aren’t getting any younger. Why don’t I call your father, and we get this thing settled in the next few days? Then, like your parents, we old folks can finally enjoy our golden years.”

“What?” Chu Dong gaped, shocked by Mr. Tan’s urgency. But before he could respond, Tan Xue’s firm voice rang out.

“I don’t agree. Why should my marriage be decided without my consent? I won’t marry!”